Picture this: you’re in class and listening to a lecture and taking some notes. Class ends and some of your classmates are talking about the lesson. Then someone asks “Have you guys started studying yet?” And then you remember that exam season is coming up and you haven’t reviewed a thing. You wish you were the kind of person that was on top of all of your studying, and work, and friends, and family, but you just weren’t this semester. How does someone even balance good study habits with work and life? Never mind about that — you’ll worry about it for next semester because right now, you gotta worry about this current one.
Are you tired of always having to start your fitness goals again? Yeah, I was too. I used to watch a video, or see a picture of someone really fit and then get really excited about working out. I’d tell myself that I’ll start on Monday because it’s the start of the week and somehow you should always do something new on the first day of the week? And then when Monday comes around, I’d do the workout, feel bad because I was more out of shape than I thought I was, and then start making excuses for the rest of the week. My favorite was: Oh, I can’t work out because as it turns out, I don’t have the time. And then suddenly my journey was over before it even really began
I used to not express my thoughts and needs because I didn’t think they mattered. I prided myself on not needing anything — always able to bend and twist myself into something that someone else needed. I was the Swiss Army Knife of a person and I was unhappy. The people pleaser in me was happy to be the person someone needed, but I wasn’t that person for myself. I realized that I wasn’t even the main character in my own story and that I wasn’t living the life that I wanted. I was the supporting character in everyone else’s life because that’s what I thought I needed to be in order to be wanted and loved. But then I was lucky to have found my community and my life partner who made me realize that they only wanted me for me and that’s when I made it my life goal to become better at communicating my thoughts and needs often and honestly.
The Importance of Communicating Your Thoughts and Needs
One of the core concepts of this blog is for me to encourage you to live your life as your most authentic self. You can’t do that unless you actually and effectively communicate your thoughts and needs. It can be so scary to do so because you fear someone judging you, but if that’s the case, maybe it’s time to re-evaluate who you actually let into your life.
I thought it would be really fun to reflect on all of the positive affirmation pins I’ve created on Pinterest for the previous month. I’ve been having so much being creative and sharing affirmations that are meaningful to me.
I remember when #affirmations started popping up. I remember cringing at videos of someone repeating something positive to themself like “I am beautiful” into the camera. To say the least, I was skeptical that something as simple as affirming a positive belief could change so much about your life. It surely takes more than that, right?
Before we get to the answer, please let me tell you a story.
It was around 2021 and I was a mess. There were so many new things going on in my life: new puppy, new home, living on my own. Also, the pandemic was still raging on outside. I was at home alone most of the time and just could not get out of this pit of despair that I had dug for myself. I was so low, so angry, so not me. I just felt like I couldn’t get out of my funk and I couldn’t find hope for the future. I just wanted to make it to night time so that I could go to sleep and be done for the day.
The craziest thing is that I didn’t even realize that I wasn’t my normal self because I had been on this downhill path for so long. I thought that this dark time was my normal, my default. To say that my personal life was strained was a polite way to say it. I came to a crossroads — continue on the easy path downhill where I’d certainly lose what was precious to me, or take my first few steps up towards a different path.
